Climbing chat

Well, I climbed for the first time in 2 months last Tuesday. It wasn't that great. I felt like I lost a lot of general strength and stamina. I am doing rockovers a lot better and though I can really improve on footwork it doesn't feel like I lost much foot technique since I last climbed....but I can really use more work.

I felt bad last time I climbed and it was really all in my head. I got frustrated when I couldn't reach some of the holds and wishing I was taller or stronger and feeling like I'm wasting my friends time, feeling incompetent and feeling really crap in general. A hobby shouldn't make anyone feel like this unless they're into feeling bad. Am not.

The insane thing is, I know I enjoy rock climbing. I have enjoyed it and I was so happy when I started to improve months ago but unlike gym and acro...I feel limited because I am short and this isn't the case. Lots of short people climb really, really well. I've seen them climb and I've spoken to a few really good short, female climbers. It is more difficult and it does take a lot of training to gain that strength, get a hang of the footwork, learn how to angle the body to get more of a stretch and have better footwork. Take advantage of the fact that the holds are bigger and short people can squeeze into tighter spots and overhangs that taller folks can't do and end up banging limbs when they try to do a drop knee.

Thomas tells me it's all about getting through a mental barrier in my case and that I have all the potential in the world to become good at climbing and to really improve if I just stop beating myself up every time I can't do something properly. He's right. I have to trust that Justin, Thomas and anyone else that's belaying me isn't angry that I can efficiently climb a wall quickly and properly and that I'm not an idiot for not being able to do this right. I really want to climb better, I want it so much and yet I don't really believe that I could be because I am short and am not good enough yet to overcome that, because I don't know how to read walls properly and I'm really trying to figure it out before I climb, because I do get frustrated when I'm faced with a reach problem and I am scared of certain walls (swinging) and not comfortable doing dynos and I have to stop all that so I can get better and keep trying at it till I do succeed and just have fun. That's what a hobby is supposed to and not be pressured to perform well and trust that my friends want me there even though I am soooooo far below in climbing skills and abilities.

That all said....I'll probably climb again this Friday and to really try not to fall into a bad head space when things aren't going right.


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